Fence Panels

Today I would like to share with you my inaptitude towards doing DIY.

I woke up this morning and was informed by my wife that one of the fence panels had blown down on the side of the garden that is our responsibility. I went to have a look, propped up the old fence panel, wedged the compost bin against it and went back inside. Job done. Or so I thought...

Apparently just wedging the panel in place is no way to fix a fence. I ended up going to B&Q. I wrestled with one of those extra long trolleys which appeared to have rear end steering so it took me ages to figure out how to push those weird things along. I eventually found the fence panels and struggled to get it onto the trolley. I bought a fence post and only crashed 4 or 5 times on the way to the checkout. I must remember to thank the kind lady who was working there though. 5 metres before I got to the checkout, she informed me that the trolley I was pushing was actually made for pulling... oops.

Anyhow, I got home, opened my book (also bought at B&Q) which tells me how to do every DIY job going in simple step by step diagrams. Not very manly I know, but hey, I'd rather follow instructions and have some chance of getting it right than guess and get it wrong.

It looked simple enough: "take out the old fence post, put the new one in, cement it in place(?!?!). Oops, I hadn't bought any cement...

I went outside to take the old fence post out. My book didn't tell me what to do if the fence post was rotten and broken off at ground level. I decided that maybe I could dig it out so for about an hour and a half I hacked away at the rotten wood. When I wasn't making much progress I resorted to using my drill. There I was drilling loads of holes into the rotten wood (I figured that if I drilled enough holes, eventually they would blend into one big square shaped hole...) when suddenly the drill bit broke off in the wood.

At that point I sort of gave up. I put the new fence post into the hole, which was now almost 6 inches deep, sawed off the end and nailed the fence panel to it. It has now been up for almost 5 hours.

I'm still waiting for the next gust of wind...

Jesus' Car

Dudes and Dudettes,

I haven't written on this for 15 days. Here's what been going on...

I turned 25 on the 18th December. I am officially in my mid twenties. Should my dreams start dying now? I don't think so...

A week later I enjoyed a protracted christmas. I worked on Christmas day in the afternoon, so I celebrated it at home with family, followed by at work with colleagues. I then had my in laws down to visit on boxing day and my family visited from London on the 28th. All in all very busy.

I thought I would share a story about my daughter today:

Emily, who is almost 3, woke up on Christmas day and came downstairs. When she saw the Christmas tree with all the presents under it her face lit up like the little fairy lights. She said "Daddy, is it my birthday?" I explained that no, it was in fact Christmas day. I also explained that Christmas was when we celebrate Jesus' birthday. "Where is Jesus?" was her immediate response. Have you ever tried explaining to a 3 year old that Jesus is everywhere, but that we can't see Him per se. Emily seemed to be happy with this until breakfast time came around.

"Where will Jesus sit?" she asked.

Becky then phoned her parents and whilst talking to her father, another classic from Emily: "Mummy, is that Jesus on the telephone?" If only...

We cleared a space and set a place for Jesus. Emily asked where He was again. We explained that He was already here.

"No He's not," replied Emily, "Where's His car?"

Kids eh?

Man Flu

Today I have a cold. Well, technically I've had a cold for a few days now, but today it has come to a head. I can't really breathe very well, my nose is dripping and my muscles are aching. Oh and I keep coughing up big lumps of mucus... All in all I don't feel very well at all. I had to swallow my pride and phone work to tell them that I could not come in today.

And what does my wife call it? That's right: "Man Flu".

I'm not a big fan of that term. It implies that us men are not really ill when we have a cold. It implies that we are making up the symptoms and that in actual fact we could get on with things and that if they (women) had the same thing they would just soldier on and not let it affect them...

I would like to put one thing straight. When we men have a cold of this magnitude we are not faking it and we are not just moping around for moping around's sake. We are ill and deserve any sympathy we can get!

And one last thing: You ladies should all be pleased that all we have is Man Flu, after all, people die of "Bird Flu"!

Laterz

Iron Maiden

Yesterday evening I went to watch Iron Maiden. I travelled with 3 friends down to Cardiff and watched them at the Cardiff International Arena. Something strange happened though. There I was in the middle of a crowd of people who were all going crazy for the band with their hands up in the air, singing their hearts out and shouting with joy whenever Bruce Dickinson sang or said anything.

In essence they were worshipping Bruce Dickinson and Iron Maiden.

Maybe that's why I felt alone in the middle of the crowd, at odds with what was going on. A short while back I would have joined them and, without realising it, would have worshipped the band. Crazy or what?!?!?

I got a strong feeling that God was showing me where I have gone wrong in the past by putting humans and their achievements before Him and His achievements...

Today

Today I am very tired. : (

Check out this hymn

Take a look at the words of this hymn. They were written in 1707 by Isaac Watts (You know, the dude with the lightbulb... Or was he the apple man? No that was Newton...). They describe the truth of the gospel in three verses so simple and yet so powerful. Take a look:

Adam, our father and our head,
Transgressed, and justice doomed us dead;
The fiery law speaks all despair:
There’s no reprieve nor pardon there.

But, O unutterable grace!
The Son of God takes Adam’s place;
Down to our world the Savior flies,
Stretches His arms, and bleeds, and dies.

Justice was pleased to bruise the God,
And pay its wrongs with heav’nly blood:
What unknown racks and pangs He bore!
Then rose; the law could ask no more.

In essence he's saying Adam (representing us) sinned so therefore we are punished to death. But through God's grace His Son Jesus takes our place, opens his arms and dies. Justice was done but death was defeated as he rose again.

Amazing to think that even 300 years ago there were still people with a faith so strong and an understanding of the bible so amazing that they often put us to shame!

Laterz

Spirit led worship.

Today I would like to talk about Spirit Led Worship.

I have been listening to a lot of teaching recently on the topic and I have to admit it rocked my world. The last few months, when leading worship at church, I have often been in a place where I felt it was my responsibility to lead people to a place where they could encounter the Holy Spirit. I felt that in order to do that I had to choose songs which would help people to worship God and that once they were worshipping the Spirit would come. I thought I needed a big band and clever arrangements to help me do this.

I now know how wrong I was.

At the Worship Central conference, Al Gordon spoke about worshippers who are filled with the Holy Spirit and how it should be His Spirit leading the worship, not us.

That touched me deeply. I no longer have the responsibility of leading people to that place. My responsibility now is simply to be filled with the Holy Spirit and to allow him to lead. It is all His doing not mine and you would not know how grateful I am of that!

I led worship on Sunday at West End church. It was a small meeting with about 35-40 people there. I got asked to lead on Saturday afternoon so had only a little time to prepare. Having prayed about it, I chose songs which I hoped people would know and that would tie in with the topic for the day, which was "comfort".

I arrived, plugged in my acoustic guitar and before the meeting we prayed. I have been feeling very close to God in the last 2 weeks and I felt His Spirit as we prayed.

All I did on Sunday morning was worship God. There were no drums. There were no clever arrangements and loud electric guitars. There were no keyboards or bass guitar.

And what can I tell you? I could not have asked for a better worship time. I connected with God, but, just as importantly, so did the other people there. And I have to stress, it was nothing I did, because all I did was stand there, play a few chords and sing the songs. The Holy Spirit was there before I picked up my guitar and He was moving.

And I love it when He moves!

See you all soon.

Alex B

All in a day's work!

Well, yesterday was an interesting day.

I started the day at 5 am, got up and went to work.

By 10 a.m. I was standing in the middle of Southampton City Centre directing traffic away from a lorry which had spilt its load in one of the most used roads in Southampton. That in itself is not too bad, but the fact that it was windy and raining/sleeting/a little bit of hail and very cold didn't help matters. I forgot my gloves at the station!!!

I survived that and went to have lunch.

I just finished lunch and had to rush to sudden death where a male had been found dead by ambulance in a very strange position, with blood all around the walls of his flat. A colleague and I spoke to other residents of the address and with a bit of common sense and research we were able to tell CID who the most likely suspect was...

So, after freezing to death controlling the traffic, and causing the city centre to almost come to a stand still, I then went on to help solve a murder!

What a job to have...

NZ Police Assessment Day

I attended the assessment day.

The recuitment team were honest, open and direct. They told us exactly what it was really like in New Zealand.

I failed the run but passed all other aspects of the recruitment day and by the time I returned home to my parents I already had an email telling me that provided I returned to do the run within two weeks and improved my time, then I had a job with them.

I have turned them down.

It was a hard decision. I wanted to go, because the weather looked so good. The people seemed so friendly and the scenery was fantastic. My kids would have been able to take part in a myriad of sports and would have all the open space they could want to run around in, but...

It's not for now. I know that now. On the day I went there was nothing making my heart skip a beat at the thought of going. There was no longing, no desire to go, and yet I am still sad at this decision.

The interviewer asked me whether I would be taking over much equity. I explained how much we would be able to afford to take and he informed me that we would struggle. We would not get on the property ladder. We would have little residual income, if any, and would have to survive without family networks.

He also told me that the police in NZ have almost 3 times the paperwork that British officers have.

Taking all that into consideration, along with my strong gut feelings, which at this time I can only assume are from God, I have decided to turn the job down.

If I have closed a door through misinterpreting Him, then I know he will get me back on the right path, after all, he got Jonah back on the right path and Jonah deisobeyed him on purpose!

Right now though, I feel called to stay in Southampton and serve Him here.

And as I typed that last sentence, a feeling of peace has come upon me and I am smiling!

See you soon.

Alex

New Zealand Assessment Day...

Today I am due to go to London where I'm going to stay overnight with my parents before going to an interview at the New Zealand Embassy, where I have applied for a job as a NZ Police Officer.

I have to admit that now, having got through two stages of the application process, I am a little worried. It's not the fact that I have to be able to run 2.4 km (that's 1 1/2 miles) in 10 minutes 15 seconds. It's not the fact that after that I will have to perform 34 press ups continuously before carrying out a grip test and a vertical jump test. Even the interview doesn't bother me too much.

What worries me now is the fact that I have a strong feeling that this is not what God wants me to do. And I don't know how to test this. I've prayed about it more since saturday when I first became aware of this feeling and I can't seem to shake it, but at the same time I am worried that maybe it's just my nerves, maybe I'm just scared as it would be a very big move...

For the first time in a long time I actualy feel like I belong here in Southampton. I finally feel part of the church here and I find myself not wanting to leave. Then there was the guest speaker in church on Sunday talking about loving "in our community" as opposed to going away on short term mission trips. I could be reading too much into it because if I were to move then surely NZ would become my community...

Sometimes I just wish God would answer my questions in a loud booming voice! Ot maybe just write the answers in clouds in the sky. Even an email would do! (although I don't think I have His email address in my address book, so it may get relegated to the Spam folder by Microsoft's excellent spam filter!)

Anyhow, I guess what I'm saying is: Please pray! The assessment day is tomorrow at 0830 in the morning and runs through the afternoon. Please pray that whatever happens tomorrow is God's outcome and that I would have a clear understanding of what his will is for me in my life.

I just can't shake the memory of something someone once said to me: "Follow your dreams, as your dreams were given to you by God and as such, more often than not, what your heart desires is also what God desires."

New Zealand has never been a particular dream of mine, but would be an easy solution to my current financial situation...

Anyway, now, having written two particularly serious posts in the last couple of days, I'll try to resume my normal cheerful content after tomorrow!

Worship Central

Yesterday I went to a conference at Holy Trinity Brompton (that's a fairly big church in London, near to Harrods, for those of you who haven't heard of it...). The conference was mainly centred around musical worship and those involved in that, and I have to say it was the best conference I've been to in a long time.

But, despite all the excellent teaching on Song-writing and on leading worship in church, the seminar which touched me the most was the one entitled "The Cross of Christ"

Jesus' cross is taken for granted so often by Christians that it has lost some of its impact. We no longer see the cross as a symbol of humiliation and suffering, but rather as just something which symbolises the fact that we are christian in the same way that a crescent moon is the symbol of islam.

In Roman times the cross was used only for certain types of people:

- Political enemies of Rome
- Slaves who had defied their masters
- Violent criminals

Essentially, for the lowest of the low.

The condemned were hung naked, flogged, in full view of everyone, begging for their lives as they slowly suffocated under the weight of their own bodies, no longer able to lift their lungs.

To be hung on a cross was the ultimate humiliation, and as Graham Tomlin, who spoke on the subject yesterday, said: "It is almost proof in itself that Jesus existed, because no person in their right mind would invent a religion in which the hero, their saviour, would have died on a cross!"

He then went onto explain the reasons for why Jesus had to die. I've often struggled with this in my own thoughts: "Why could God not forgive us without anyone dying?"

Tomlin explained the following:

Jesus was fully man and fully God. As He was a perfect man he had no sins for which to pay a price. As he was fully God, God experienced everything that Jesus did, as he is an integral part of God.

When something wrong happens we often just excuse them, for example, if someone bumps into you on a bus, they say sorry, we say "don't worry" and instantly forget about it. We excuse their behaviour as there is no price to pay, we lose nothing in doing so.

Forgiveness comes into play when something much more serious happens. When your husband or wife sleeps with someone else. Or when a teacher abuses your child at school. Or when a drunk driver hits and kills your toddler. (That last one struck a raw nerve with me too.)

In those situations we have two choices as humans. We can either choose the more immediate and obvious route of revenge, i.e. "He has to pay!" or we choose to forgive, i.e. "I have to pay" There is always a price to pay, and it has to be paid by someone.

The price is paid in pain. There is no way to forgive someone without paying the price yourself. That is why it is never easy to truly forgive.

If someone owes you £100 and you forgive him the debt, you are £100 poorer as you now have to use £100 of your own to pay back your creditors. You cannot forgive that debt without losing £100.

As God is a god of love, he chose the route of forgiveness. He paid the price of sin himself. He Himself experienced death in order that we might experience life. That was the price. That is what he did for us. He paid the price of our wrongdoings by experiencing death in the most humiliating way. A death that should have been yours and mine.

Can there be a greater love?

Musical Penguins

As promised, today's topic is "Musical Penguins"!

Just in case there are any arctic twitchers out there reading this, this is not about a new breed of penguin that can dance or play musical instruments, so I'm sorry to disappoint. If that was what you were after, then you may want to stop reading now, in order to avoid further disappointment...

Has anyone ever noticed how when penguins walk/waddle anywhere they always go in a big group, they all walk the same way, follow the same route, they even all look the same!

I'm talking here about a lack of individuality.

When I was growing up, and first became aware of music, dance music was coming into its own. The first number one which I actually remember watching on TOTP (before that national institution was dropped by the BBC...) was d:ream's "Things Can Only Get Better. It was in the first few months of 1994 and I was 12. I actually thought it was quite good at the time...

Anyhow, as I grew up I realised that actually, that song wasn't that great... In fact the whole chart system was fundamentally flawed as it was now no longer run by artists who could play instruments and create individual music, but by "music moguls" who could churn out carbon copy artists to sing songs written in the key of G to please the masses... Where had the talet gone?

At my school of over 500 people, there were only 5 of us who played guitar. That's 1% of the population of my school... That was rubbish. How was any new talent going to emerge into the world if all people were listening to was either computer generated dance music or boy band ballads written by songwriters who either couldn't sing or simply did not have the required physical attributes to be on TV...

Don't get me wrong though, every now and again a band or artist would break into the charts and show a flair of individuality; bands like Radiohead, Muse and even groups that I didn't like so much such as Beautiful South. But they were not the norm. The "artists" in the charts were singing songs aimed at 8 year old kids who, unfortunately grew up. And when they did, the artists were shelved, there later claims to fame being simple appearances in celebrity big brother or worse, Celebrity Scissorhands!

When we hit the year 2000 with the advent of The Strokes and the White Stripes I thought that maybe finally real music would return to the charts. And it did. For a while. Those bands were individual, with a new sound. They played guitar and suddenly hundreds of people everywhere started learning to play guitar and now 6 short years later, instead of there being a plethora of bands all playing individual music, the charts are full of bands that sound like each other.

The Futureheads sound like Razorlight who sound like Franz Ferdinand who sound like The Bravery who sound like The Kaiser Chiefs who all at the end of the day sound like variants on The Strokes.

If you are really after some truly exciting new bands, my suggestion would be that you check out some of the following sites:

www.dweebmusic.co.uk; www.muse.mu; www.benfolds.com; www.eelstheband.com; and finally, if you are willing to venture outside the world of english language, check out www.qui2nous2.com and www.skank.com.br

I'm not blaming the bands involved. I'm blaming the individuals who run the charts. The individuals who crush individuality by making original music so hard to find...

And to all you people out there who do play an instrument or want to be in a band, all you songwriters, ponder this:

In ten years time, when music tastes have changed again, who will still be here? Will it be the carbon copy bands I've mentioned or the originals who may not have the same degree of chart success, but definitely stand out from the crowd?

Think of Radiohead. Think of Muse. Think of U2, Green Day, or even the Rolling Stones (The ultimate example of a long lasting band!) What they all have in common is that they do not follow the flock and as a result have outlasted many of their contemporaries!

Be yourself!

Alex

PS: Please note that I can't guarantee the content of the websites mentioned above. Musically they are all very original though!

Life and What goes in to it...

I don't really know why I decided to call my blog that... I think it was the pressure...

There I was, just thinking to myself: "I wonder how easy it is to set up a blog?" and next thing
I know I'm at this page...

It started off easy enough. Name, email address, password and then suddenly:

BLOG SUBJECT?

ANSWER NOW!

I think I must have panicked. Who am I to even consider what goes into life?

I did consider just calling my blog "Me" but I thought that might be a bit egotistical (if that's how you spell it...) My next immediate thought was "penguins", but as I have no real interest in penguins (although I always laugh when people imitate penguins... It's just the way they walk youn know...) but I thought that title was a bit ambiguous and certain penguin lovers may be disappointed to stumble into this with to find no real mention of penguins at all really...

As you can tell the pressure was really building so I just wrote the very next thing that came into my head which was "Life and What Goes in to it"

You'll soon discover, I'm no expert, being only twenty-four at this time and, as such, maybe I should re-label this as "Life - What have I stumbled into?"

Anyhow, a bit about myself: I'm twenty-four, as I said, although I turn 25 a week before christmas, I have a wife, Becky, and three children, Emily (almost 3), Miriam (almost 2) and Naomi (about 7 weeks old). I work as a police officer in Southampton England and most people think I'm the strangest police officer they've ever met...

I love music and play guitar/write songs, and take an active part in Community Church (www.community-southampton.org) here in Southampton.


That was enough for an introduction. If you come back tomorrow, you'll find out more about me and my thoughts. Tomorrow's subject:

Musical Penguins.